Kids Get in Your Heart Despite Their Parents

I have to remember that you can not expect a rational response from an irrational person. And certainly not when they are drunk.

This started by my asking Aaron if he had the kids for Easter. It falls on "his weekend". He would have to check with his X, their mom and see if he was going to be allowed them on that weekend. I said if he did have them, would he consider leaving Katie and Chris with me when he brought McKenna back on Saturday. They could be here, have Easter (you know color eggs, make baskets, Easter Bunny the whole deal) with us, go to church, then meet up with the rest of the family for a big egg hunt and ball game. I would then take them back to their mom. They live in Cary past Raleigh. I was surprised to hear from him days later that he did have the kids and I could take them on Easter. Great the Easter Bunny hopped into action, basket goodies etc. This will be fun.

Well, I got a familiar call from Aaron. He was not going to be taking the kids this weekend cause he was going to work. He could not pass it up it was Holiday pay. So I had to find someone to take care of McKenna on Good Friday cause the day care is closed and I was left to deal with his X on how to orchestrate the weekend.

She and I played phone tag most of Thursday afternoon. We finally talked at about 4:30 PM. Katie and Chris want to come to my house so all is go with the weekend. Well, until I said, great when is it convenient for us to meet half way on Saturday. She won't meet half way. She does not with Aaron and she will not set that kind or precedence with me. I can not carve 4 hours out of Saturday to go and get them and bring them back. My college roommate is coming in from VA. Alyssa has friends coming over to work on a project for school, we have lots to do. I was in the middle of setting up for the Maundy Thursday Passover Dinner for 300+ people at the church when I spoke to her and told her I would see what I could do. She said they were going to their church and Katie and Chris were taking their first communion. She had bought them a corsage and boutineer for it and it was going to be great. I was a bit distracted cause I was really swamped helping to get ready for the dinner. We hung up with them going to their church for the first communion, me getting ready for our dinner and trying to figure out what I could do to go get the kids on Saturday.

We got home from the Passover about 9:30. By 10:something I wrote her an email saying I was very sorry I just did not have a way to get the whole way to Cary and back. I was expecting for Aaron do bring them here blah blah blah. At 11:something I get a phone call. "You didn't call me back. I waited to hear from you and you didn't call me back. We didn't go to church for communion cause we were waiting to hear from you. This is not going to happen... And blah blah blah." She was DRUNK! In the blah blah blah was "this is weird, I am dealing with my husbands Exwife seeing my kids" (um... Isn't he her X-husband and Michael is the fiance of 4 years that she has yet to marry but they live together? And last the legal stuff said, I was Aaron's wife - but I did not split those hairs) Drunk! "Not setting a different precedence, you want to see my kids you come and get them, Katie has tears streaming down her face asking me Mom just this once meet her half way, NO! I will not alter my precedence" Blah Blah Blah! "Aaron's says he does not understand why you want them anyway, he says you resented the kids cause they already had a mother" (I never resented them cause they had a mother, I resented that their mother used the kids to cause problems for me and Aaron).... Blah Blah Blah... "He says you never wanted to be with them before but I have all this stuff at my house with their hand prints, crafts you made with them, things you did with them, but they don't need a lot of stuff, they just need you to spend time with them, be a mom. It is going to stop here. I will not change my precedence, you want to spend time with my kids, you come and get them." I calmly listened because you can not expect a rational response from an irrational person. And certainly not when they are drunk.

But they are kids. I know I will never be a huge part of their lives. I do not want to be their mom ,they have one. I am their step mom til our divorce is final butonly in title I suppose. But they are kids and you do not abandon kids. As long as they know I am here and that I care about/love them, then that is really all that matters. I have NO ulterior motive. Honestly and truthfully, it was just to offer Katie and Chris the opportunity to go on and egg hunt and to a ballgame. The same opportunity I offered my friends Lisa, Cathy, and Katherine and their kids. They are just kids and deserve better than what their parents are giving them. Well, it is not meant to be better, just something nice with people who care about them that they would enjoy. Despite their parents who have hurt my heart, it is not about me, it is purely just for them.